Episode 124 - Navigating Grief in Midlife: Finding Hope & Healing
Welcome, friends, to this week’s episode of the Season of Joy Podcast! This is your space to explore the unique challenges and opportunities that come with midlife. Today’s episode dives into a topic that touches all of us: grief—especially as it presents itself in midlife.
If you’ve been feeling overwhelmed or stuck, remember, I offer clarity conversations to help you navigate through life’s hurdles. You can find more information on my website Season Coaching under the "Work With Me" tab.
Understanding Grief in Midlife
Grief is more than just sadness—it’s a deep, complex process that impacts us emotionally, mentally, physically, and spiritually. Whether we’re grieving the loss of a loved one, a relationship, a job, or a phase of life, grief in midlife can feel particularly heavy.
In this stage, we often face multiple layers of loss. From parents aging and passing away to children leaving home, or even personal health changes, it can be overwhelming. But grief is not something to “get over.” Instead, we learn to carry it, and our capacity to hold that grief can expand over time.
The "Two Jars" Grief Analogy
I came across a powerful image that explains this well. Imagine two jars: one pint-sized and the other a gallon. Both contain the same size rock, representing grief. In the smaller jar, the rock takes up most of the space, while in the larger jar, there’s more room around the rock. The grief doesn’t shrink; our capacity to hold it grows. This illustrates how, over time, we develop more space around our grief, even though it remains a part of us.
Why Midlife Grief Hits Differently
Midlife presents a unique set of challenges when it comes to grief. Here are some reasons why:
Multiple Losses
During midlife, we may experience concurrent losses—parents, friends, or even jobs. These can feel like they come one after another, leaving little time to process.Shifts in Identity
Losing parents or mentors may shake our sense of identity, as we transition out of the "child" role. Likewise, empty-nest syndrome forces us to redefine ourselves as parents.Mortality Awareness
As we age, we become more aware of our own mortality. This existential realization can make grief even more profound.Competing Demands
Balancing caregiving for children and aging parents can leave little emotional bandwidth to deal with grief.Resurfacing of Unresolved Grief
Earlier losses that we didn’t fully process might resurface in midlife, compounding the current grief.Life Reassessment
Grief often triggers a reassessment of life choices and priorities, which can be unsettling.Physical Changes
Hormonal shifts and health issues in midlife can make coping more difficult. You may experience fatigue or emotional swings that make grief even harder to process.
My Personal Experience with Midlife Grief
Over the last few years, I’ve personally faced nearly all of these midlife challenges. My children left home, I lost both of my parents, I’ve gone through surgery, experienced hormonal changes, and had strained relationships that blindsided me. At times, it felt like everything was falling apart. I felt lost and broken.
In midlife, there’s this expectation that we should have it all together, which makes grieving feel even more isolating. People may assume we know how to cope because of our age. But grief is not something that gets easier just because we’re older.
Navigating Grief with Grace and Faith
For those of us who are people of faith, grief can challenge our spiritual beliefs. We might wrestle with questions about God’s plan, the meaning of suffering, and our own mortality. However, faith can also be a source of comfort and strength during difficult times. Personally, my faith in Jesus Christ has been a tremendous source of comfort. Knowing that I’m not alone in my suffering, and that my Savior understands grief, gives me peace.
5 Practical Steps to Navigate Grief in Midlife
Acknowledge Your Grief
It’s okay to not be okay. Give yourself permission to feel and express your emotions. This might mean talking to someone, journaling, or finding another creative outlet.Find Support
You don’t have to go through this alone. Reach out to trusted friends, family, or even a coach or therapist. Knowing you're not alone can make a huge difference in processing grief.Strengthen Your Spiritual Practices
For those who lean on faith, practices like prayer, meditation, or scripture reading can be grounding. They help us feel connected to something bigger than ourselves and remind us we’re not alone in our suffering.Practice Self-Care and Patience
Grief takes time, so be gentle with yourself. Engage in activities that nourish both your body and soul—whether it’s walking, mindfulness, or simply getting enough rest.Embrace a New Normal
As difficult as it may seem, finding a way to embrace the new normal that comes with loss can lead to healing. Grief changes us, but it doesn’t mean we’re broken. We learn to carry it and live alongside it.
Embracing the Journey
Grief, especially in midlife, is complex and multifaceted. But by acknowledging it, seeking support, and leaning on faith and self-care, we can navigate this challenging season with grace and resilience.
If you're feeling stuck or overwhelmed by grief, remember, you don’t have to go through this alone. I’m here to support you, and we can explore how to navigate this journey together.
Stay strong, my friends, and as always, keep finding joy, even in the midst of the challenges.
By embracing our grief, leaning into faith, and taking care of ourselves, we can continue to find joy and strength in this beautiful season of life.
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