Thoughtful Thursday & Articulate

ON THE BLOG

ARTICULATE

Often, we fail to communicate what's important to us to the people in our lives, assuming they should already know or would recognize our values if they loved us.

This can lead to misunderstandings and miscommunication.

We might avoid expressing our wants to manage other people's emotions, which is called people-pleasing.

However, it's impossible to people-please for long before feelings of exhaustion and eventual resentment set in.

What if we could honestly articulate our wishes, desires, and wants to our loved ones without manipulation, but from a place of love?

For instance, suppose a co-worker frequently asks you to cover for them, and you feel frustrated because you think they should understand that it's too much.

However, you don't want to hurt their feelings, so you keep agreeing and feeling resentful.

Instead, you should get curious and ask yourself questions.

Do you want to cover for them?

If so, how often?

What does that look like in terms of days or hours per week?

Once you're clear with yourself, you can tell the whole truth, which could be that you want to help them, but only to a certain extent.

You could decide to cover for them more one week, but it's because you want to, not because you're managing their emotions.

Expressing what you want honestly with yourself might be all that's necessary, and you can start saying yes or no as you please.

Alternatively, you might want to have an honest conversation with your co-worker, telling them how much you can cover for them and apologizing for not being honest before.

You don't have to justify your decision, and your co-worker's reaction is out of your control.

The more you practice telling the whole truth, the more liberated you'll feel, showing up as your best self from a place of love.