Episode 104 - Sacred Space
Episode 104 - Sacred Space
Hello, my friends!
Welcome to the podcast. How is everyone doing? I can’t believe the weather happening where I live. It was snowing earlier today and now the sun is shining. We had a warm time over the last week or so and now it is cold again. It can’t make up its mind. I saw a meme the other day that said something like, “Come on Spring! You are even fighting for it!” That is what it feels like. I love winter but man I am looking forward to spring. I really do love all the seasons, maybe that is why I called my coaching practice Seasons Coaching. Every season has beautiful things about it as well as difficult things but that is how the seasons of our lives are like as well. Resisting the weather doesn’t change it. It doesn't mean I have to love it but I don’t have to fight against it either. That is how life is.
Anyway, I want to remind you that I am offering another Season of Connection Group Coaching Program beginning April 9th. This on-line group is designed to show you how you can create greater connections in your relationships. This group will be on Tuesday evenings from 7-8 pm MDT for 6 weeks. When you join this group, you will receive a workbook and content videos where I will be teaching you concepts and tools that you can begin applying to your own relationships. Each week we will meet over zoom for a group coaching call where you can ask questions and get coaching. I created these groups as a safe and supportive space to learn, share, and grow. If you are interested in participating in this next group just visit my website, www.seasons-coaching.com and click on the Connection Group tab at the top of the page.
Now, on to this week’s episode.
Last weekend, I held a one day workshop called Navigating Midlife with Grace. I had a few guest presenters help me make the day a success. I want to share with you a few takeaways from this workshop.
We taught about coming to better know yourself at this season of life. Taking the time to explore what your values are and what is important to you. It can be challenging for us, especially as women in the midseason of life, to know what we like or what we want on a personal level. We have spent so much time nurturing and caring for others which is a beautiful gift that we have to offer. But what can happen is we can spend so much time nurturing others whether it be our families, our partners, our children, our neighborhoods, our religious community, our co-workers, that we forget to nourish ourselves. We forget to tap into ourselves so we forget who we are. I remember one of the attendees talking about how when she was younger she had confidence but now she doesn’t.
We taught about strengthening our connections with others. This can be challenging because people have their agency and when they don’t do what we wish they would we can find ourselves believing that everything has gone wrong. Believing that if they would change in some way then we could be happy. But when we do that, we create a lot of frustration, disappointment, discouragement, resentment, and resistance for ourselves. When we are in that place, we don’t show up in our life as our best. We are so focused on what someone else is doing “wrong” that we lose sight of how we are behaving. But taking responsibility for how we think, feel, and behave allows us to create a totally different experience in our relationship regardless of the other person.
We also taught about our relationship with God. The biggest takeaway that I hoped people took from this part of the workshop was that God loves them. God loves you. Understanding who we are and that we are 100% valuable, lovable, and worthy removes the need for us to prove that. Once we understand this truth, we are better able to focus on who we want to be and the kind of experiences we want to have in our lives. I believe that we weren’t meant to walk this life alone. We have a God who knows us probably better than we know ourselves and who wants to succor, strengthen, and lift us. That is the enabling power of Jesus Christ. The mantra I say to myself each morning as I look in the mirror and give myself a high five, like Mel Robbins teaches, I say, “I am a beloved daughter of Heavenly Parents who love me and I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.” Each day, I remind myself of my divine identity. We all have that same divine identity whether we believe it or not. And then I focus on putting one foot in front of the other as I go throughout my day believing that Jesus is walking alongside me on my journey. This practice has been life changing for me. Years ago, that is not what I would say to myself in the mirror. It was more like, “you are so fat,” or “you are so ugly,” or “what’s wrong with you?” Today, I occasionally will have a thought similar to those pop up but I don’t allow it to stay. Years ago, Elder Dieter F. Uchtdorf gave a conference talk where he talked about saying “stop it” when you find yourself saying unkind things about others. But this is just as true for ourselves. When I notice myself going to the negative beliefs about me, I say “stop it.” Those thoughts are not welcome anymore. But understanding my relationship with God has helped make that change.
In coaching a client today, I had this thought come to my mind. We were talking about what I call the progress formula. Awareness + Acceptance + Compassion is what really helps us move towards change. But I also started thinking about how this actually is like grace. The Savior knows us. He is aware of our strengths and our weaknesses. There is no putting our best forward to try and look a certain way. He is fully aware of all of us. There is no hiding who we are or what we have done from Him. He knows. Yet, he fully accepts us. He understands we are human having a human experience. He knows we will fall and make mistakes. He knows we won’t always show up as our best. He accepts us. That is what the atonement is for to help us to help us move forward regardless of our mistakes. We just have to accept Him. Because he knows us so well and he accepts where we are in our own personal journey, he has great compassion. He has actually been human. He knows heartache, betrayal, and sorrow. Because of this He can succor us in ways that are really hard for me to comprehend. He descended below all because He loves us. The scripture in John 4 says, “Herein is love, not that we loved God, but that he loved us, and sent his Son to be the propitiation for our sins…We love him because he first loved us.” His compassion comes from that place. This is grace. Awareness of our shortcomings. Accepting us anyway. Or maybe not “anyway” because we are here to learn and grow so why wouldn’t we be accepted? We are experiencing being human as was designed for us to do. Feeling compassion for us because we are loved and understanding the pain that will come because of this earthly experience. As we learn to better take the awareness we gain about ourselves while accepting ourselves for where we are at and having compassion for the struggles we face as we navigate all that comes with being human, we are better able to accept and be open to the grace of God. Awareness + Acceptance + Compassion not only helps us progress but it is grace.
In the workshop, we also incorporated mindfulness, meditation, and a restorative yoga practice. I love this piece of it because it invited participants to slow down and get present in their bodies after all that thinking. I really think that is the amazing part of these practices. Sometimes, the best thing we can do is to stop thinking. Many times we spend so much time thinking that it becomes overthinking and feels very overwhelming. Getting present with ourselves without necessarily thinking about anything gives us a chance to calm ourselves and show our brain and our body that we are safe and that everything really will be ok.
Overall, it was a beautiful experience with some amazing beautiful women.
One thing that I came away thinking about was being a coach is a sacred thing and puts me in a sacred space.
When people come to me, they are coming to me because they are in pain. They are struggling in some way and they are looking for a way out of the pain. They share their stories with me and we work together to find ways to navigate the pain while learning how to release the suffering and invite in more joy. This place is a sacred one. Being with people in their dark places and trying to shine a light on what else is possible is a sacred place. This podcast is a sacred place. I come each week to share some of my thoughts and experiences in hopes that it will inspire and lift you to become the creator of your life.
It is an honor to walk alongside you and those that I have the honor and privilege of coaching in my coaching programs. Thank you for sharing your stories and your pain with me and for allowing me to share that sacred space with you.
Remember, you are loved. You are amazing. You can be the creator of a life you love no matter your circumstance. It really is.
That is all I have for you this week. Thank you for sharing your time with me.
Are you ready to take what I teach to a deeper level? I would love to be your coach!
Register HERE for my 6-week on-line Season of Connection Group Coaching Program that begins on April 9th.
Click HERE to schedule a FREE Clarity Call with me to learn more.
Grab the 5 Day Relationship Reboot Challenge Workbook HERE.
For another great FREE resource, grab my Mending the Rift: Repairing Relationships with Adult Children.
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